Please and Thank You

Veterans Day was created as "a day dedicated to the cause of world peace."  Although it originally commemorated the temporary cessation of hostilities between the Allied Nations and Germany on the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month of 1918, the Great War or the War to End All Wars was soon followed by a long list of wars and conflicts.  So much for world peace.

Today my Facebook newsfeed is full of people thanking our veterans for their service.  Yes, there are pictures of veterans in uniforms and stories of where loved ones served and lots and lots of flags.  But always the words Thank you for your service.

Most of us were taught to say thank you when someone did something for us or gave us something.  Saying thank you is simply good manners.  But I have struggled with this current exercise in lip service.  (If you find that comment offensive, just hang in there, okay?)  It reminds me of Have a nice day, a hollow and meaningless cliche that we cannot seem to retire.  I wonder how many times a veteran is verbally thanked in this way?  And is it meaningful to him or her?

As if to answer my question, my neighbor (whose two sons served in Afghanistan) posted this from a Facebook page titled Crusty Pissed Off Veteran:

We all dread this day. It's a day where we are all thanked for the things we have done. A day where everyone is obligated to say thank you. We don't know how to say, "You're welcome..." without sounding like absolute assholes. But then the majority of us don't want to be thanked. We want our friends back. We all, to a man, want to go back in time and do whatever it is we could do differently to send someone home that is not there today. So desperately is this our desire that we dread this day. The day we have to awkwardly say, "You're welcome..." to people who are oblivious as to exactly what they're thanking us for...

We recognize more memorial days than you. We sleep less than you. We drink more than you. We twist and turn, in the little sleep we get, more than you. We regret more than you. We wish things were different more than you do. We are grateful for things more than you are. We want to go back in time...more than you do. We want to trade places more than you do.  We are angrier than you are. We are more alone... than you are. 

You're welcome.

This is one reaction to the issue.  I'm sure there are other veterans who revel in the thanks that come their way, I hope on more days than just this one.  But Crusty Pissed Off Veteran makes a good point.  And it should be heard.  There is nothing hollow in his sentiment.

My own nephew, who served in Desert Storm, is one soldier whom I know would like to go back and try for a different outcome for a loss that he suffered.  I know he has struggled all these years.

BUT!  Today, on this Veterans Day, my nephew's second son was born!  And long before the contractions began, the little guy's parents had decorated his room in red, white, and blue!  Poetic justice?  I think so!

I can thank my nephew for his service.  But I would rather say to the Masters of War:  Please!  Do not send this child -- or any of our children -- to war.