Take these sunken eyes and learn to see
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to be free
A Red-winged Blackbird was at my feeder a few minutes ago. All day, I have been struggling to find something to love. It's not a good day for me. I returned from a glorious trip to a sick cat. I've been in denial about the seriousness of her illness for a couple of weeks now, but it was obvious to me on my return home from six days away that her condition is more dire than I'd imagined. A trip to the vet today confirmed that. So having committed myself to falling in love every day, how could I possibly put aside my sorrow to find love?
And then the Red-winged Blackbird appeared. They are not a rare sighting; actually, they are quite abundant in this area, but their return to the Northeast is late February, early March, and this was the first one I've seen. Its subtle beauty lightened my mood, if only briefly. But in that brief moment, I fell in love.
I've written before of my fascination with birds. I like to think that they are harbingers rather than omens. And I try to pay attention. So was it accidental that in my time of sadness and worry that this bird should appear? Nearly any occurrence in my life conjures music; hence, the Beatles lyrics above. But also, Neil Young's Birds is compelling and meaningful:
Lover, there will be another one
Who'll hover over you beneath the sun
Tomorrow see the things that never come
Today
I don't know. I have some processing to do. But the birds speak of freedom and inevitability and vision beyond the present. I will try to let them guide and console me. And I have the Red-winged Blackbird to thank.
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